What happened to Discipline?

[marval]

That is dreadful Judy, what ever made him do that? I know the mother loves her son, but she must see that he is punished. it seems that you can't say no to your kids, without it causing trouble. In my day if your parents said no to you, that was it, you accepted their decision.


Margaret

[Krummhorn]

It's a shame that the mom was beaten like that ... but, imho, having been a single parent (Mr. Mom) for a number of years, I don't think this violence happened purely because there wasn't a father or father image in the home.

Of course, there are always two sides to the story ... we haven't heard the flip side of the event, or what happened in the days or weeks prior to this incident.

It goes without saying that I do hope the woman recovers from her injuries ... and the worse injury of all is having her Son behind bars.

I certainly agree with Margaret ... when my parents said "no", that meant exactly that and we never even thought of crossing the line and contesting their decisions, regardless if we thought the were right or wrong.

[Contratrombone64]

Actaully I think, Lars, that all stories have three sides: Yours, Theirs and somewhere in the middle, The Truth. Don't you think?

[Krummhorn]

You're absolutely right, David

[Contratrombone64]

Yeah - as to the vexed issue of discipline. It's always the same, isn't it? There will always be one little deadshit who pulls your chain, but the majority of folk just comply and don't cause havoc.

[Soubasse]

A couple of days ago, I noticed on the news that smacking a child with a wooden spoon has now become assault with a weapon which really got my ire up. Once again, the PC brigade is ensuring that absolutely no form of discipline - however harsh it may be interpreted - is able to be used. And then some of the same people wonder why todays teens are so disrespectful.

Stupidity continues its reign. I mean for christ's sake, I was smacked with a belt, a shoe, a wooden spoon or I guess whatever was to hand when I was young (good thing there wasn't a meat-cleaver nearby?!), but I could never have accused my parents of being "bad parents." And that was not through fear of any kind of repercussion, no, I had a place and I had to learn it. Nor could I have ever thought of suing them years on for some conveniently invented psychological trauma.

I'm not criticising a psychological assessment or a condition per se, but there are far too many who simply use their diagnosis as an excuse for being a d*ckhead - I've seen it first hand, too many times. In terms of teen behaviour, there used to be a line that was not crossed, but these days that line is virtually non-existent.

Sorry, I'll go now and get someone to throw a bucket of cold water over me ....

[Krummhorn]

Bingo!! Well said

I couldn't agree with you more .

[marval]

I agree, It is time parents were allowed to discipline their children. No discipline in the home, and then none outside the home.


Margaret

[greatcyber]

Being a parent carries with it a strong responsibility which, unfortunately for the youth of today is sadly lacking. Without proper direction from a young age how can a child understand how to act in society? Children crave direction and lack of such leads to delinquency. It would be a good thing if parenting was taught in schools since there seems to be such a lack of common sense today.

Corporal punishment can have lasting implications, but a good smack in the mouth when a child utters profanity or lack of respect will surely stay in that child's mind and might cause him/her to think twice before repeating the action. A spanking always was a reprimand that taught a lesson. Beatings have no place in any situation. But there has to be a common ground or else you have society run amuk.

[Soubasse]

Beatings have no place in any situation. But there has to be a common ground or else you have society run amuk.

Hear hear! I think one of the problems is the that there is no sensible distinction being made between beating and smacking. My understanding is (yes, probably simplistic) that "beating" is done in a furious rage and is usually incessant pounding, whereas a "smack" is a carefully calculated, once only hit that is intended to shock rather than subdue (or knock unconscious).

And yes, it's a hell of a grey area these days.

[Buttercup89]

Personally I am very much for discipline, however I think that violent parents are a terrible example for their children, and beating your child in the name of discipline is still violence. I am very much for not spoiling children and for giving them restrictions, but violence is wrong. It is just as wrong to beat your child as it is to beat your wife, because your child too is a human being.

[greatcyber]

Hear hear! I think one of the problems is the that there is no sensible distinction being made between beating and smacking. My understanding is (yes, probably simplistic) that "beating" is done in a furious rage and is usually incessant pounding, whereas a "smack" is a carefully calculated, once only hit that is intended to shock rather than subdue (or knock unconscious).

And yes, it's a hell of a grey area these days.

That reminds me of a quip that Roseann Barr used to make: "They say you shouldn't beat your children when you are angry...when WOULD be an appropriate time to beat your children...when I'm feeling especially festive?"

It was a funny line, but as stated previously beating has NO place in society in ANY case. A spanking when deserved is a learning experience for teaching boundaries to children. A smack (not a wallop) can be most eye-opening for a child. Lack of discipline in youth leads to tweens, teens and adults that cannot function well in society. There does need to be a happy medium.

[jhnbrbr]

I think that most people can see a clear line between violence and legitimate punishment. It isn't easy bringing up children and if smacking is banned altogether that's one less option available. I was looking after a relative's child once and after a difference of opinion he decided to bite me on the leg. What was I to do? Sit him down and explain to him at length how his behaviour was totally unacceptable? No, that wouldn't have conveyed the strength of my feelings, so I smacked his bottom instead. And we've been best of friends ever since ...

[greatcyber]

Exactly the point I was trying to make.

[Soubasse]

Very good case in point there jhn