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Thread: Musical jokes

  1. #106
    Rear Admiral Appassionata (Ret.) intet_at_tabe's Avatar
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    Is the Devil a guitarist:


    Best regards,
    intet_at_tabe

  2. #107
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    HaHa Intet

    I had heard the joke before, lovely picture though. He seems to be tattooed all over.


    Margaret

  3. #108
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Last Summer, the local orchestra decided to play Beethoven's 9th Symphony.

    However it being quite hot, the players were working up quite a sweat, until a neighbour let them use the ventilators in her house.

    However, the wind from the ventilators was causing the notes to blow all over the place, so they had to tie them down to the note holders.

    The din from the ventilators was so bad that the bassists decided it didn't matter if they downed a few drinks and got royally drunk.

    Two of the bassists go so drunk that they passed out.

    One of the violinists, in disgust, decided to go home but slipped and fell.

    Thus, it was the bottom of the 9th, the bassists were loaded, the score was tied with two men out, and the fans were roaring wild when one of the players slid home.

  4. #109
    Rear Admiral Appassionata (Ret.) intet_at_tabe's Avatar
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    You know that Bill Clinton quit the Saxophone? Yeah, well now he plays the whoremonica.
    Best regards,
    intet_at_tabe

  5. #110
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Pupil: ( after singing a song horribly) How did you like my execution?
    Music Teacher: I'm all in favour of it.

  6. #111
    Commander, Assistant Conductor
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    LOL! I've had surgery in May and I'm almost at 100% now.

    Jan

  7. #112
    Vice Admiral Virtuoso Mat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by intet-at-tabe View Post
    You know that Bill Clinton quit the Saxophone? Yeah, well now he plays the whoremonica.



    Way to go, Intet


    Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent.
    -- Victor Hugo


  8. #113
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Hi Jan,

    Sorry you had to have surgery, glad you are better, welcome back.


    Margaret

  9. #114
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    metro joke

    gnome auditioned to conduct a huge city symphony orchestra. Sadly, the head judge told the poor gnome, "sorry, you just don't have what it takes to be a conductor." The gnome refused to allow that to stop him. He bought some chic new clothes, some really cool shoes, got a snappy new haircut and even bought a swank loft in the heart of the city. He then auditioned again and was hired on the spot. Why? because now he was a.......(scroll for answer...you' re gonna love this)



    DRUM ROLL.......

















    metro gnome
    __._,_.___
    Jan

  10. #115
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Thank you Jan, very funny.


    Margaret
    Last edited by marval; Jul-07-2008 at 17:09.

  11. #116
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    Sorry the print came out that way. How can I change that? I got the joke from a message board.
    Jan

  12. #117
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Hi Jan

    Go to click on edit, highlight the message you want to change. At the top click on the little arrow, next to the big A. A colour chart should come down, click on the grey colour just above the white, that should change it for you.


    Hope that helps


    Margaret

  13. #118
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    It was visitor's day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard singing "Ava Maria" and singing it beautifully. Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil.

    A visitor listened in wonderment to the performance and then approached the choir. "I am a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard."

    "Yes, I'm very proud of them," said the conductor.
    "You should take them on tour," said the visitor, "what are they called?"

    "Surely that's obvious," replied the conductor. "They are the Moron Tapanapple Choir."

  14. #119
    Captain of Water Music Hawk Henries's Avatar
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    Funny one Margaret!
    I wish You Peace
    Hawk

  15. #120
    Admiral Maestoso marval's Avatar
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    Thank you Hawk

    Glad you enjoyed it.


    Margaret

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